“step one you say we need to talk
he walks you say ‘sit down it’s just a talk’
he smiles politely back at you
you stare politely right on through
some sort of window to your right
as he goes left and you stay right
between the lines of fear and blame
and you begin to wonder why you came

where did i go wrong, i lost a friend
somewhere along in the bitterness
and i would have stayed up with you all night
had i known how to save a life

let him know that you know best
’cause after all you do know best
try to slip past his defense
without granting innocence
lay down a list of what is wrong
the things you’ve told him all along
and pray to God he hears you
and pray to God he hears you

as he begins to raise his voice
you lower yours and grant him one last choice
drive until you lose the road
or break with the ones you’ve followed
he will do one of two things
he will admit to everything
or he’ll say he’s just not the same
and you’ll begin to wonder why you came

where did i go wrong, i lost a friend
somewhere along in the bitterness
and i would have stayed up with you all night
had i known how to save a life…”

~ “how to save a life”… by the fray

Every time I hear this song I am reminded of the need to love others. It is such an essential thing to be sensitive enough to catch on when somebody needs to talk, when they need an encouraging word or smile, when they need someone to cry with or just an ear to listen. How easy it is, though, to take the selfish road and think of ourselves instead. After all, I’ve got school, work, homework, church, piano, and a million other things to think about and concentrate on…. Right?

What a dangerous mindset to get into… Yet it’s so easy to slip into this type of thinking.

Although I may be all caught up in a whirlwind of good things, none of it means anything if I’m not loving, if I’m neglecting the people God places me around. There’s a reason He’s put me in the midst of the people I come in contact with… even if I never know the reason until heaven.

Humility, love, and complete realness have to be major factors in the equation, or else I don’t have a chance at saving a life. Being open and willing to let God lead, to let Him speak instead of myself, is crucial. Without these, anything I say or do is pointless and void.

How simple it would be to just remember that I don’t know it all instead of trying to fix somebody’s problems my own way. How simple to just be there for a friend. But as a human, I am selfish and prideful.

Guess what… I found out why I’m back at Edison for at least fall semester. I mean besides for my classes. And besides working at my same tutoring job. I found out a couple of weeks ago why I’m there.. on a deeper level.. why God brought me back there at this specific time and gave me a Wednesday afternoon class in 115… I saw a dear friend – just out of the corner of my eye the first time, and I thought, “Is that Amy?”… I saw her a day or two later, same time, same place, and we got to talk for just a minute. Just enough to say hi and good to see ya. That kind of thing.

Well, probably two weeks or so later, Amy had the chance to come and talk in the hall – for more than the half-minute “how are you?” as we pass by each other.[Let me give a bit of background here… I’d not seen Amy in over a year and a half, due to her taking a break from school to deal with leukemia and chemotherapy. She’s in her 40s, I think. I met her back in the spring of 2005 when we had speech class together, and we became friends. That was at the beginning of her health issues, before she’d found out about the cancer. By the time fall came, she knew about it, and she told me. We’d pray for each other previous to that and kept up with it.]

So when she had the opportunity to talk, I asked how everything was going. She was having an appointment at the end of that week, but they thought she might be in remission. And then she started to cry and she hugged me… She told me that she’d been really nervous about starting back to school again. She’s in anatomy, and that class is.. um.. not easy. And then came the first day we saw each other in the hall this time around. It was just a quick “Hi, it’s so good to see you” kind of thing. But she went home so encouraged. Just because of that. She went home and told her husband “guess what”… and he of course didn’t know… and she told him that I was there at school. And he told her, “See, I told you it would be okay. God is taking care of you.”… Because she had a friend there.

I’m not anybody particularly special. Not any more than the next person. It doesn’t matter though. All it takes is being willing to let God use me and paying attention to those around me, being a friend and showing God’s love to others. It is so humbling to make a difference, to be used by God… to save a life.